I wrote this on October 1st, 2010...
"its been a week and a day since the most devastating world wind of my life... and that may sound overly dramatic to some, but to me it is a complete and total understatement.
about a year and eight months ago I was just 20 years old and I was standing at the alter in my long white dress vowing my heart to my soul mate forever, and he was doing the same. Not a relationship free from complications, but one full of passion, pain, and most importantly love.
in these past days I have watched my marriage dissolve, leaving me feeling scared, alone, and broken. my whole life uprooted and turn upside down. This past week has been thee hardest week of my life. Feeling the most pain I've ever experienced as if i was mourning a death. Not only having to deal with betrayal from my partner and separation from my partner, but also the stress of quitting my job, leaving everything behind, moving back in with my parents and adjusting to everything in my life no longer looking the same."
...I wrote that over 5 months ago and here we are.
January 31st just happened to be our 2yr wedding anniversary.
how bitter sweet.
Bitter, because of all the damage surrounding us
Sweet, because we stood there in it, reunited, ready to pick up the pieces.... together.
Today, almost 2 months later, we are healing the broken places.
Thee most gut-wrenching, beautifully painful, terrifying soul renewal I've ever endured.
Never been so weak
and so strong.
Never been so scared
and so fearless.
I love him. I never stopped. My vows weren't in vain. For better or for worse we are husband and wife. We can't change whats happened in the past but we can take control of the future. I don't need the world to understand us... we've been misunderstood our whole lives.
So slip that ring back on and let everybody know our story ain't over just yet.