Friday, January 29, 2016

messy masterpiece

I'm totally cool with shattering illusions about myself. I'm so far from perfection and its way to exhausting to pretend like I have it all together. The truth is I'm a mess, just like you.

Yeah you.

I have this ridiculous need to prove I am enough. Usually I'm just trying to convince myself.

"Sometimes your worst enemy is in your own skin, sometimes it shares your face and claims to Love you. That hateful voice is not Love- I promise you. There will come a day when your fight is bigger than your fear, when you nearly claw your way out of your body to prove you exist- leave that skin for someone else and design your own wings. You are masterpiece, magnificent your glory. Have you seen her? "

 - Natalie Patterson

Sometimes your worst enemy is in your own skin. 

Can you relate? Have you ever felt that? Have you felt no matter what you try to accomplish in your day there is that voice in the background of your mind discouraging you at every turn, telling you that you aren't enough, pointing out all your flaws, reminding you of all your past mistakes? 
I think we all have those truths that we are afraid to say out loud. Those ugly truths that we tuck away, that cause us to hold guilt and shame. That keep us bound to this false idea of ourselves. Illusions.

Illusions we cling so tight to.

As of late I've been inclined to let that shit go

Its not always easy.

Tonight was rough.
Tonight was SO necessary.
Tonight I released. 

I feel lighter, tonight.